Welcome back to another installment of GoFuckYourself Friday, a collection of the wildest crap we’ve stumbled across on GoFundMe this week. If you’ve seen a GoFuckYourself-worthy fundraiser out there in the big wide world webs, let us know.
Let’s get right to it.
It’s NFL draft season and that means some poor unfortunate soul will be drafted by the Cleveland Browns. One Matt Huber put up a GoFundMe page to “send flowers, and possibly provide a therapy session for the player who is inevitably going to be a shell of his former self by the end of the night.” Lettuce pray.
An Arkansas native has fired up a GoFundMe page after vandals caused nearly $300,000 of damage at Mt. Holly Cemetery in Little Rock. The vandals caused extensive damage “including shredded both the American and Arkansas flag, ripping out iron crosses that marked Civil War soldiers’ graves, and defacing two children’s graves by pushing over the statues of the sisters buried there,” she writes. The GoFundMe page itself isn’t ridiculous at all, what’s ridiculous is that these clowns think defacing a cemetery is something fun to do. May their nether regions be infested with the sting of a thousand wasps.
Guess who says they made it to Minnesota to mourn Prince? Oh yeah.
These folks are trying to purchase a domain name from the devil. I’m not making that up, that’s literally what they wrote.
Check it out, GoFundMe is making it rain on campaigns.
— Danny Boy O’Connor (@DannyBoy1968) April 29, 2016
Our friends across the pond are rubbing it in that they have “free” socialized healthcare and we don’t. Thanks, you guys, kick us when we’re down why don’t you. Glad to see someone else’s misery and financial ruin can bring you such joy.
Please RT if you’re relieved to live in a country where people don’t have to set up GoFundMe pages to stay alive pic.twitter.com/oRlcaal60I
— NHS Million (@NHSMillion) April 28, 2016
That’s it for us this week. Have a great weekend and safe crowdfunding, y’all!