Well, I wish I had some good news to pass along but it appears this case just let out a wet, disappointing fart. Joyell “J.D.” Riley of Mansfield, OH was first arrested at the end of June — prosecutors said she faked veteran status as well as breast cancer for a GoFundMe campaign that went on to raise $3,515 from over 30 people. So, they hit her with a wire fraud charge and off we go…

She initially called the charge “bullcrap” but Riley later took a plea bargain, stating that it was “better than fighting this whole thing in court” and “easier” so she could put “all this crap” behind her. I’m not doing air quotes, that’s literally what she said.

Anyhoo, she’s been sentenced for that bullcrap charge, and her punishment is — pardon my French — horseshit. That’s right, I’ll see your bullcrap and raise you a Schillingerism.

Vern Schillinger

The Mansfield News Journal reports that Riley was sentenced Monday to three years probation and ordered to pay $3515 in restitution, $7,500 and ordered to pay a $100 special assessment to the court. Considering she faced up to 20 years in prison and a $20,000 fine, not bad.

So concludes this leg of Joyell “J.D” Riley’s journey as fake Marine, breast cancer survivor, and terrible GoFundMe grifter. She still faces charges of theft, forgery, and tampering with records in Richland County for allegedly poorly altering military service records.

Semper f—— fuck, never mind.

 

 

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